Lately Snack Break: St. End

“Snack Break” is Lately’s interview series where we chat with people we think are interesting, for about as long as it takes you to finish your afternoon snack. Our second in the series is with St. End founder and friend of Lately, Erin Gabriel….who for the longest time, I thought was named Erin Gabe.

Erin is an internet cool girl with a natural eye for design that would make Alexa Chung blush.

The florist by-day, jewelry designer by-night is the sole force behind the accessory brand St. End, named for the latter half of your childhood “BEST FRIEND” necklace.

Whether you’re looking to rock a cow-print hair barrette, give your kid sister a beaded bracelet that says “Paul Rudd” or want to elevate your outfit with a pair of glow in the dark flower earrings, Gab(ri)e(l) is your girl.

Her brand St. End is full of bold colors, dreamy shapes and original ideas that turn your ears, wrists, and hair, into a full-on party.

You just always seem to know what looks good. Where do you think that comes from? Do you have any inspirations?

EG: First of all, thank you! I would accredit my Aquarius-ness for always having my finger on the pulse of any new style trends; it’s important for me to stay on top of the curve, or try at least. 

I also think growing up with a mother that was constantly repainting, redecorating, and tweaking the style of our home played a huge role in how attuned I am to design. She and I have always been keen on DIY projects for home decor and fashion, so I think that translates into my inspiration for starting St. End. 

So your DIY spirit is what drew you to making jewelry?

EG: I have been making my own jewelry since I was little and got my first pair of jewelry pliers and a tackle box full of beads. In high school when I couldn’t find accessories that were to my liking, I would buy cheap costume jewelry from Forever21 and reconstruct [them] to add charms or rhinestones or beads, until I had a piece of jewelry that was totally unique to me.

I used to make bracelets out of zippers and vintage beads my Grandma gifted me and sold them at art fairs. I guess I’ve always been a jewelry entrepreneur lol.

You’re so creative! You’ve made earrings in the shape of gummy worms, tombstones, bananas, mushrooms and butterfly wings! Where do you get your ideas from?

EG: When I’m designing pieces, I start by sketching ideas for shapes if I plan on working with polymer clay. This then leads to a big trial and error process where I see what color and shape combinations I like. I also use Pinterest and IG for inspiration. 

You also give your pieces these insanely good pun-based names. Where do those come from?

EG: I keep a running list of names I like or think are clever and usually end up texting my friends to see what they like best. Niche references are a big part of the St. End brand.

Your Halloween collection just dropped and it was amazing. What’s next for St. End?

EG: I really hope to get into designing molds for custom metal jewelry. I would love to have custom molds cast into finer materials like sterling silver or 14K gold.

Five years from now, I just hope I’m still designing and creating pieces that are fun and I want to wear! That’s really why I started St. End- to create jewelry that I want! I just got lucky that other people want to wear it, too.

If you could make jewelry for any celeb, who would it be? 

EG: Immediately I thought of Phoebe Bridgers since I recently made a pair of ghost earrings inspired by her Stranger in the Alps album artwork. I think I would cry if she wore a pair of my ghost earrings.

Oh, also AOC. I can picture her wearing a pair of my tiny gold hoops. I think it would be very on brand for her. I just want people to feel cool when they wear my stuff and to know that it was created with so so much love.

Honestly, that’s my favorite part of your brand. You can tell a lot of thought and care went in to every piece. It feels like you’re wearing a little piece of art. For Lately readers who haven’t shopped St. End yet, what are the essential pieces?

EG: Crushed Little Stars, Uptown Pearl, Daisy Dukes, More Cowbell, and a custom Stretchy Bracelet to finish off the look.

You can follow St. End on Instagram at: @st.end_

M*ney

I am currently saving money for a pair of shoes that don’t actually exist.

I know that I want new shoes. I mean, I always want new shoes. But after a recent closet purge at Buffalo Exchange where I made $160 selling what felt like $1,000 worth of goods, I realized I had sold a lot of my nicer pieces, including fancy shoes that I currently have no business wearing (because where the hell do I even go?), but will want to replace to wear later.

I pulled open tabs on Staud, Suzanne Rae, Maryam Nassir Zadeh, Brother Vellies, etc… and quickly realized — 1. Sh*t, I am broke, and 2. Would it feel as good to instantly replace my shoes (and go into even MORE debt) than it would to save up for a pair I actually have my eye on?

Also 3….. or do I want a purse??

So, they’re more metaphorical “shoes” than anything.

One of the few reasons I am so glad to live in 2020 (including being on the same plane of existence as Harry Styles) is that there is an app for everything. I’ll preface this by saying, THIS IS NOT AN AD. I have in no way been paid to endorse anything. I just really love the Digit app.

You can make this money app do whatever you want (besides give you more money lol). Right now, I have it scheduled to pull a little money (and I mean truly a tiny bit) from my checking account for a “rainy day fund,” and a little bit of money that I use to pay my credit card bill with.

So when I realized I might want new shoes/a new purse/diamond earrings/the magic potion that will make Harry Styles fall in love with me, I set up a new “Savings Goal,” as the app calls it.

I labeled it “NEW SHOES!!!” Because I am someone who enjoys caps and exclamation points to make life more exciting. I picked a random number to save up to that would afford me dream shoes, and in a time frame that would turn my little nest egg into a present for New Years (because 2021 HAS to be better than 2020. Especially if I start it by wearing new shoes.)

The app then alerted me that it would need to save between $5 – $15 every day, depending on what’s in my checking account.

My lizard brain thought…$5 to $15?? That’s like…my daily Starbucks coffee and a bagel! NO! But then my humanoid brain whispered into my hippocampus, “I dare you to do it, bitch.”

Yes, this post is disgusting and steeped in privilege. I am a woman who can afford to save money for something she doesn’t actually need. Giving up a daily dose of Starbucks is not a hardship.

What I have learned about myself since March 2020, when everything shut down and changed, is that I am a person who spends money to feel better. During the pandemic, it has reached a fever pitch (mom I know you are reading this and freaking out. Please take a breath and calm down.) I know, through communicating with friends, that other people are going through a similar thing. But it still feels incredibly shameful and isolating.

It feels good to buy goods that support small business, because everyone is floundering. But then I feel like I am floundering (mental health wise) and I want to support myself through self care. Then I realize that I am a piece of sh*t because the world around me is crumbling and I need to donate to bail funds and free food fridges and NOT buy that Amazon potato peeler because I should be at a place in my life where I am perfectly fine just peeling all my fruit and potatoes and things with a knife, and if I wanted to practice good self care I would just go paint my nails or something. Which makes me think about how I want new nail polish and then the cycle starts again.

So I have been meditating on it.

I may not actually buy “shoes” or a “purse” or anything at all.

I would like to think I am trying to break this money cyclone I have created for myself, and be more mindful when it comes to WHY I am making purchases, and stop that bottomless hole feeling. Do I feel anxious right now? Am I buying new bedsheets because I am depressed or because I can’t get that hot sauce stain out? Will I still want this item in 2 weeks? Remember the glitter chair quarantine purchase????

By acknowledging that I am saving money for a goal, I am attempting to have less of a knee-jerk response to self-soothe by entering my secret code on any website that takes Shopify.

That includes unsubscribing from sites I like that offer me daily deals and my compulsory “I left the house coffee” (which NGL, is going to be super hard because it has become a ritual for me to go on a walk to get that delicious, delicious iced bean water).

I will be real with you my beautiful readers, who I hope don’t think I am now scum on the bottom of a Jimmy Choo… I do still want shoes. And I will probably allow myself one coffee outing a week. But I have made this blog post in an attempt to be accountable? In an attempt to be transparent?

Both, I guess.

I just hope someone out there relates to this/doesn’t tell me to burn in hell for behaving irresponsibly with my money.

Please don’t punch me in the face if you see me with an iced latte on the street.

X

LL

Have a Cozy-Making Sunday

I am writing this to you from my kitchen table, where I have a lovely view of an aluminum butter wrapper that has flown onto my balcony and out of someone’s trash. Either that or my upstairs neighbors are dumping their garbage out of their window.

I have yet to learn to love life on the east side.

ANYWAY.

I have a face mask on, I’m wearing my gnocchi Uggs, and I’m sipping some re-heated coffee. To add to the major relaxation vibes, Dan has football on (which is serving as my background noise ASMR for the day) and I have lit every single candle in our apartment. It is the late-teens of October and I am extremely dedicated to the spirit of Sunday cozy-making.

While it still may not be cold enough in LA to wear a sweater and I will probably have to say R.I.P. to any plans I had to go to a pumpkin patch this year, here are some things on the internet that are making me feel especially cozy today:

In the spirit of becoming my own favorite Midwestern aunt, it is my duty to inform all of you that this is the last day of Bath & Body Works buy 1, get 1 3-wick candle sale.

This weekend I listened to the Amelia Diamond episode of Gee Thanks, Just Bought It, and it was like spending time with an old friend. Diamond left Man Repeller (now called, Repeller) in 2018 and I have missed her voice/sense of humor ever since.

As soon as I take a leisurely solo trip to the grocery store to buy ingredients, I’ll be baking this apple cider doughnut cake.

Independent book stores really need your help right now. Even if you don’t have time to read (or like to), you definitely have friends and family who do. Consider buying a book, tote bag, or cool crewneck sweater to keep these places open. Here are a few independent book stores that I love: Unabridged Bookstore (Chicago), Women & Children First (Chicago), Skylight Books (Los Angeles), City Lights Bookstore (San Francisco), McNally Jackson (New York).

I got into my friend’s car after months of not seeing her and one of the first things she said to me was “you smell SO good.” I just started wearing this perfume.

I used to hate tomatoes and now I am obsessed with bursting them with olive oil and a little garlic to make pasta sauce. Will probably make some variation of this for dinner this week.

Have you been doing yoga at home? I’ve been really into SarahBethYoga’s videos. Sometimes I take a 15 minute break from work to do this one. I’ve also been looking for a new yoga mat. Anyone have any recs?

Just copped this plaid jacket from Minnesota/North Dakota brand Kittsona. I’m going to have to wait a little until the temps drop to wear it, but when I do I’d love to pair it with something like cozy like this. Mommy blogger fall is the vibe.

Speaking of mommy blogger fall, every year I consider buying this Everlane glove boot. TC if you’re reading this, I need you to peer pressure me into it!!! NO RAGRETS

Hope you’re somewhere cozy, enjoying Great British Baking Show, and drinking mugs of tea.

Love

LL

I’ve Finally Discovered My QuaranTALENT

My Instagram feed has become a parade of people I know displaying their hidden talents. I had no idea so many of them could make focaccia bread! Or cross stitch! Or build furniture! And while it’s been wonderful to watch, it’s also inspired me to try to find my own.

After crashing and burning at friendship bracelets, failing miserably at French braids and making my boyfriend ingest a truly awful fried rice made with apple chicken sausage, I’ve finally figured out what MY hidden quarantine talent, or “quaranTALENT,” if you paid attention to my headline — is.

Shockingly, it’s not TikTok (although I definitely think it’s hers), or baking banana bread (we know how that turned out), cutting my hair (have yet to attempt), or even tie dying sweats.

Here is what it is: BAKING COOKIES.

I am actually really freakin good at this? I have made mostly chocolate chip (my preferred cookie), some gluten free with choccy bits and most recently, a vegan oatmeal chocolate chip recipe from the NYT cooking app that used a banana instead of butter or eggs. And they’ve all been delicious.

I really did not bake cookies often before this? The last time I recall making some was for my boyfriend in college and I burned them.

Go figure.

I am much more of a cook (fried rice aside) than a baker because cooking = playing and baking = rules.

Plus, baking is really just chemistry and I failed chem in high school. Shoutout Doctor Kasparian, C Block!

However, I have found calming magic in the methodical baking of cookies. I get a lot of pleasure from mixing and then forming the sticky little dough balls in my hands, then smooshing them a little on to the crinkly parchment paper resting atop my cookie sheet. My brain gets calm knowing you can basically put anything in a cookie — chocolate chips, peanut butter, sprinkles, shredded coconut, pretzels, etc… and it will turn out okay.

I like the way they smell.

I like that if they are a lil lumpy it’s okay.

I like that they take 10 mins to bake.

I like the way they look sitting in the Tupperware that I have now coined my “cookie container.”

I enjoy this process so much I have even briefly flirted with the thought of purchasing a cookie jar. Is that gauche? Just look at this gorgeous one from Williams Sonoma and tell me I’m wrong!

Anyway.

What’s your quarantalent? Do you have one? Do you WISH you had one? What would it be? Let me know in the comments. I’ll be here, looking at cookie recipes.

xx

L

So Everything Sucks & The World Feels Horrible

Now what?

I tried to bake banana bread today. Chrissy Teigen’s recipe. I had been looking forward to it all week and even braved the store to buy some brown-ish bananas. But because I was too excited and didn’t remember to check, I hadn’t noticed that my roommate and I didn’t have a bundt pan to bake it in….or really any proper pan to bake it in. She has an 8×8 brownie tin and tbh it kind of sucks.

The other half of this bad news black and white cookie is that our oven doesn’t heat evenly and I have also found that the temp drops while cooking!

So basically my beloved, vanilla pudding, chocolate chip Chrissy recipe was 75% perfectly baked with a circle of raw banana bread dough in the middle.

That’s kind of how life has felt recently.

We have so many good things and then there’s just this sinister center, spoiling it all. You can delete Twitter, you can avoid Apple News, you can walk from Studio City to Silverlake and fill your Uggs with blood blisters but you can’t outrun the bad news of what’s happening in this life, right now, all over the world.

I texted my best friend Andrew this morning and told him about my bread.

“Honestly, I’ve had that happen before and my advice to you is just…eat the cooked outside and move on,” he said.

This morning it felt overwhelming and exhausting and discouraging to still be quarantining with absolutely no signs of things going back to our regular pace of life. Also, a deli in LA that has been around longer than I have been alive, is closing officially and for some reason that news really sunk me because as a Jew, and as a person who loves delis — I hate seeing good places I went to with my grandparents close.

But after a lot of crying this morning (bc bread and deli and also quarantine) I have decided starting this today, I am going to try to take to heart the words of my best friend — not just in regards to my banana bread (I did eat the cooked portion and it WAS divine. Thank u Chrissy!) but to all aspects of this life and this sucky situation.

I will eat around it.

I will consume the good parts while acknowledging that yes, the under-baked glop did ruin my perfect thing, but that I’ve still got to move on.

There are other breads to bake. And if I don’t feel like baking, fuck it! There are a ton of local bakeries that need help right now and I’ve got the funds. I can find joy in my favorite things in other ways.

Plus, it wasn’t a total loss. It was also a learning experience. I now know I need to buy a bundt tin so like…if anyone can show me a small business that sells bakeware it would bring me joy to give them my coins.

Everything sucks and the world feels horrible but there’s a good 75% that’s still edible and yummy and full of things to enjoy like watching the movie Charade or taking a bath surrounded by scented candles, eating pasta with lots of cheese, or walking all the way to the top of the hill to get a gorgeous view of the valley.

One day all of this will be over.

Eventually.

I hope.

Until then

75% yours

xx

P.S. LESS DEPRESSING POSTS ON THE WAY SOON I SWEAR!!!

I’m Obsessed With Looking for Stickers for My Hydro Flask

And I oop!

As an aspiring VSCO girl, I recently found myself on the internet, surfing for stickers for my Hydro Flask.

If you don’t know what a VSCO girl is, it’s a trend born from extremely online teens (mainly from TikTok) who have created the persona of a girl who edits photos with the VSCO app, wears a lot of scrunchies, oversized tees, makes friendship bracelets, wants to save the turtles by drinking exclusively from non-plastic straws and drinks from a Hydro Flask.

Oh, and she says “and I oop!” and “Sksksk” for some reason.

I don’t feel like doing more research as to why. I am incredibly old.

ANYWAY

They slap stickers on their water bottles.

Because I want to be one of them, I went searching for some suitable stickers to adorn my flask. It led me down a rabbit hole of some truly insane art. This is what I found exclusively on Red Bubble because I didn’t feel like mining Etsy:

SIDE NOTE: Trends aside, Hydro Flasks are actually really great water bottles. I have kept ice in my water for HOURS without it melting.  I’m very impressed.

This Peppa Pig One

Is Peppa the original VSCO girl???

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This Super Depressing One

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This One That Needs To Shut The F Up

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This One I Would Actually Get

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The Truly Chaotic Energy Of This One

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Low Key….Want This One

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LMAO

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Okay I Actually Bought This One

Looking at it is giving me a chic migraine

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Someone SHOULD Get This One

It’s cute

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SKSKSKS

Bye

 

Pimple Patches: What Works & What Doesn’t

Let’s talk pimple patches! Zit stickers! Blemish bubbles! Spot dots!

If you have no idea what they are, they’re basically pimple-fighting bandaids that come in a variety of shapes and sizes. You’ve likely seen them on your cool little cousin’s face via Instagram story.

I like them a lot because when I wear them, I don’t pick at spots on my face, which I’m prone to doing–thereby avoiding a large ugly scab!

If you’re anything like me (a 26 year old who still gets acne) then at some point you’ve probably tried them out. You were standing in line at Sephora or Urban Outfitters and saw pimple patches in the impulse buys and thought, “eh…what hell?”

Then you went home and after a few days of sticking shit to your face, were like wtf this doesn’t work.

However, if you’re actually insane like me, you’ve wasted a shit ton of money tried so many of them you now know what DOES work and want to share the wealth.

You’re welcome.

COSRX Acne Pimple Master Patch

These were the first pimple patches I ever tried because my actual goddess Rio Viera-Newton said they were good and her word is typically bible. These are good for sucking the gross stuff out of a mostly surface level pimple. They do best on a flat space like a forehead, front of the chin or cheek. They come in a variety of sizes but they aren’t very flexible and if you have a zit that’s on an angular part or anything curved, it’s not going to stay put.

Peace Out Acne Healing Dots

While these are awkward size wise (they only come in one size), I find that they tend to stick to the contours of your face better than some others. While these aren’t my first choice for cystic spots (deep, painful ones that won’t pop) these are pretty good at reducing inflammation. Plus, they’re sold at Sephora so you don’t have to bother with online ordering bullshit.

Acropass Trouble Cure Patch

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. #acropass #アクロパス アクロパスエーシーケア . . @acropass7 さまより キャンペーンで頂いていました🥺💕 ありがとうございました🙇🏻‍♀️ . . こちらは、マイクロニードルのニキビパッチに昼用のパッチとスキンクレンザーが一緒に入っている有難いセット!🎉 . . 🌿マイクロニードル 溶解性のマイクロニードルにはヒアルロン酸とEGF、ナイアシンアミド、みんな大好きビタミンCなどの配合成分が。 髪の毛の1/3の細さの繊細なニードルで皮膚角質層に浸透してお肌の中で溶けて浸透します!✨ . ニードルの周囲はハイドロコロイド湿潤バンドでできており、密着力はあるのに周りの皮膚が荒れない👏🏻 . 🌿防腐剤・添加物なし! . 🌿最低2時間で配合成分がしっかりと吸収されます。 . . 🌿デイケア用のパッチは大好きなハイドロコロイド製❤️ . . 常に顎ニキビ、たまにTゾーン全体。 とにかく調子が良くなったりぶり返したりで苦しんでおります😥 . すぐに治らなさそうなものにはこういったパッチをひたすら貼り続けています! . そのままにしてるより治りが断然早い気がします! . たまにできるニキビにお悩みの方にはオススメ!🥺 . #コスメレポ #韓国コスメレビュー #コスメレビュー #review #スキンケア #ニキビ #ニキビパッチ #マイクロニードル #韓国コスメ #韓国化粧品 #韓国旅行 #韓国メイク #韓国好き #韓国好きな人と仲良くなりたい #韓国すきな人と繋がりたい #韓国コスメ好きな人と繋がりたい #コスメ好きさんと繋がりたい #コスメ購入品 #韓国美容 #コスメ好きな人と繋がりたい #한국 #korea #seoul #cosmetics #いいね返し #makeup #f4f #l4l

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If you suffer from the occasional cystic, painful, deep, never popping pimple…. These are the fucking BEST!!!!!! They are outfitted with little “needles” (not actual needles, it’s like little pointy edges) that penetrate your spots, allowing the acne medicine to go deeper into the afflicted area. I slap this puppy on right when I feel trouble emerging and seriously it’s better in like a day or two. Reduces redness, size, pain…everything. I would NOT use this on a white head or a more surface level pimple because it can be drying to the area/over kill.

The only annoying thing about Acropass is that I can really only find it on SokoGlam or very occasionally at Riley Rose (in store and online) so it’s smart to have a back stock of these otherwise you’re going to pay that $$$$ overnight shipping.

Mighty Patch

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Did you catch the new sleeves in our Duo? 😉

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BIG fan of Mighty Patch. BIG fan. You can get these in a bunch of sizes and they even sell sheets now so you can cut them yourself if you desire a particular shape. They are soooo thin and invisible you can wear them under makeup if you want or just out alone and people will really have to squint really hard at your face to see where you have one on. They’re not super effective on deep spots, but they WILL work on most things from white heads to like proper pimples that you think will pop by E.O.D.

Starface

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album dropping soon

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Cutest packaging award goes to Starface. Starface was created by Julie Schott aka who I wish I was on Instagram/in life. These little yellow star pimple patches are so friendly looking you can’t help but look forward to getting a spot so you can slap one on. They’re thin and their star shape makes them adhere easily to any contour on your face and stay put. What I REALLY like about these is how hydrating they are. I’ll be honest, they don’t do much in the reducing inflammation department but they will hydrate your spot if you’ve been picking at it or if whatever you’ve been using to combat it is drying you out.

I think they’re super adorable and wear them out into the world. However, both Kate and I have separately done this and different people have told us “Oh…you have a little mustard on your face.”

ANYWAY

If you’ve never tried a pimple patch before and you have acne (or a spot), consider it. They’re way better looking than that gross clay stuff that’s supposed to dry it out but never works. Promise.

xx

IT’S FALL!!!

Never mind that the Earth is on fire and it’s 85º in various parts of the country. It’s FALL, witch.

Time to put your favorite cozy sweater on, change your Twitter handle to some sort of spooky pun and blast that AC while you bake pumpkin bread.

In celebration of Oct. 1 and also because we haven’t written anything in a long ass time, here’s a link pack of fall shit we think is cool/wanna do/buy/see/eat/etc…

Have you seen these Everlane “Glove” boots? The chestnut color would look amazing in a pumpkin patch/apple orchard.

Let the cast of Succession usher in sweater weather.

Fall makes me want to wear vampy nail shades like this one that I got at Rite Aide or this hot cocoa color.

Trader Joe’s maple streusel bread is really, really good if you don’t like pumpkin stuff but want something seasonal.

I recently followed this goth/witchy/mom Instagram. They post stuff like this:

and this:

I made these brownies and my sister said they were the best she ever tasted. Don’t read the comments that say they take like 20 mins to bake. They take about 40. They’re SUPER fudgey.

I recently discovered that the majority of my friends don’t know what kugel is. It’s a sweet (or savory) Jewish noodle (and sometimes potato) casserole. My gentile boyfriend likened it to flan (he’s wrong though). Regardless, I would love to try this Molly Yeh cardamom and apple kugel recipe to enjoy when I break the fast post Yom Kippur. FYI you can eat kugel hot OR cold.

Fall always makes me want to listen to Elliott Smith.

Still not in the spirit??? Check out this list of every pumpkin spice product you can buy right now.

BYE UNTIL NEXT TIME

🎃

Lately Snack Break: The Broke Yolk

“Snack Break” is Lately’s new interview series where we chat with people we think are interesting for about as long as it takes you to finish your work snack. Our first in the series is with The Broke Yolk founder and friend of Lately, Tori Hyndman.

Tori Hyndman is one of the funniest people on the internet.

She’s the creative force behind The Broke Yolk, the most entertaining food and lifestyle blog that you’re not reading yet, but need to be.

Hyndman does it all from suburban food tours to easy recipes to snarky side comments that will have you howling. Her voice is that of your best friend who also knows how to whip up the perfect hash AND make a mean martini. She’s who you want in your kitchen but also who you want in your phone to call when you’ve drunk texted your ex on the way to get 2am pizza.

Yes, The Broke Yolk is part cooking blog and part diary but it’s also 100% “Whatever [Tori] wants it to be goddamnnit.

Lately was lucky enough to ask our longtime internet friend a few questions. Check them out below!

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So, why did you start The Broke Yolk?

TBY: I started The Broke Yolk because I was getting tired of Twitter being the only place I could write/scream into the void. I do some writing at work but I don’t have the ability to drone on about non-dairy milks or deliberately call out the guy who I hooked up with last Halloween. I think I just wanted a new place to talk about food and what I’m cooking. And I wanted to be creative and try my hand at graphic design and work on my website skills. 

Who is inspiring you rn?

TBY: I am a fan of women doing cool things in the food and restaurant space – Molly Yeh makes me want to be happy and bake cakes. Ina Garten makes me feel like I can roast a bird, luxuriate and order custom shirts and not feel bad about it. My mom is a great cook who taught me to use an obscene amount of garlic and I will forever thank her for that. I like Alison Roman’s red-orange nails.

Not Bobby Flay he sucks. 

LOL. I know you’re also obsessed with the Bon Appetit staff. A lot of people on the internet are these days. I sadly am not. Please explain this to me!!

TBY: I am not “obsessed.” I did have an unhealthy crush on a human employed by the magazine and slid into DMs more than once but I have moved on and am better for it.

People love BA, especially the Test Kitchen crew, because the content is centered around beautiful people making delicious food while they hanging out with (what appears to be) their friends. The newer verticals like Basically and Healthyish are doing a good job of meeting Millennials and Gen Z where they are and what they want out of cooking/feeding themselves.

Mostly I think people like BA because the Test Kitchen people are hot and are all individually micro-influencers. Personally, I think they’re all sleeping with each other.

What’s YOUR best cooking advice, Toe?

TBY: Wolfgang Puck told me to learn how to make one thing really well (I didn’t think that was great advice, but it’s my only chance to say that Wolfgang Puck gave me cooking advice, so take it haters).

Okay then to make it more relatable, what’s your worst cooking mistake?

Sometimes I leave the oven/a burner on which is scary I guess because we could die. Other than that, and the time I accidentally dropped all of my ravioli down the garbage disposal when draining the water, I like to roll with the punches.

You currently live in D.C….where are your favorite places to eat?

TBY: Depends on the occasion and who’s buying but I love Le Diplomate. It’s a Steven Starr restaurant (Philly-based restaurateur) so I feel a kinship to my cheesesteak brethren when I eat there. Regardless, everything is so yummy.

Must-gets are the oysters (seafood tower if you’re not paying), the gougères, which are these little airy bread-cheese puffs of heaven, the warm shrimp salad, the mushroom tart, roast chicken, crème brûlée— it’s all so good.

What would your last meal be?

TBY: Probably shake shack

Give me three people (living or dead) that you would love to eat a meal with.

TBY: I always get nervous with these questions because I don’t think I want to eat a meal with three strangers??? I would be so nervous. Picking people I know seems weird unless they are dead relatives or something.

Can I bring a friend? If so, it would be Friend, Mindy Kaling, and BJ Novak because I mostly just want to see how Mindy and BJ vibe in real life. Is there tension? Does he listen or smile when she speaks? I need to know.

I’m not cooking (because what if it’s bad). We can order in some fancy takeout and I’ll bring wine and a dessert from a nice bakery.

I will also make note of how much BJ tips the delivery guy.

I can’t believe I am the friend you are bringing to dinner with Mindy and BJ! Thanks! But if it was just us, where would you take me?

TBY: In D.C. I would take you to this place called Little Sesame for lunch. It’s a yummy hummus shop and it’s so good and decorated all cute. For dinner we could do Compass Rose or Iron Gate for nice ambience and good cocktails. There’s a cool vegan restaurant called Fancy Radish we could go to because I haven’t tried it yet!

You’re on your way to becoming an influencer. What food or beverage brand would you want to sponsor you?

TBY: Eggland’s Best needs a hot young face and I am up for the challenge. 

Let’s say you come out with a cookbook. What are you going to name it?

TBY: Eggs n’ stuff. Cooking with Friends (your anxiety and depression). I’m still brainstorming. 

Also, you are my only friend who makes martinis and I love that about you. Tell me what got you into this?

TBY: My mom is my martini inspiration! [Queen Jag] loves dirty vodka martinis (exclusively Ketel One) and taught me how to make one. I do strictly vodka over gin, extra dirty, and I LOVE a blue cheese stuffed olive.

My mom always says, “no vermouth” when she orders them, but honestly, I can’t tell the difference. You can get buzzed off one drink which makes ‘Tini Time classy and economical!

If the whole internet isn’t  reading The Broke Yolk by now, they SHOULD. What are some things you want your new readers (and old readers I guess) to take away from your posts? Besides laughing at all your incredible asides, of course.

TBY: I want them to learn that you do not need to be cool or hot or good at cooking to make food and have fun with it (I am however all of those things so I see where this can get confusing). I want them to allow themselves to feel feelings and not feel guilty about whatever they’re putting in their mouths (I want to allow myself that too). 

What post should they start with?

TBY: I’ve only been posting for about a year and I’ve only posted like 10 times…but I worked really hard on the one about my hometown’s weird eating spots. It was fun to write when I was hiding from my family at my parent’s house over the holidays and I came out of it with an appreciation for the strange, but also extremely normal, place I grew up.

I also love the Glossary page (does that count as a post?) because I say wild things and I want to continue to say wild things and play with language and abbreviation and acronyms so I like the idea of having a resource for my readers to learn a little more about me and why I say the things I say.

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Tori Hyndman aka Toe aka The Broke Yolk

Celebrities I Would Have a Full-Scale Meltdown Over If They Unfollowed Me

Maybe you know (or maybe you have a life) but Billie Eilish unfollowed YouTuber Tana Mongeau on Instagram and it ruined her existence day.

She even made a vlog about it.

I don’t know anything about Mongeau other than the fact that I think she got married to one of the Paul brothers (the one who didn’t take a video of a dead body). However, I respect the level of extra she is being over this unfollow.

Billie Eilish is a queen. Unfollowing Mongeau is like revoking her stamp of approval. She is officially no longer “cool” by music prodigy/baggy clothes wearing/green haired, William Eyelash’s standards.

Damn. That must feel cold ASF.

Luckily, there are really only a few celebs I would lose my lunch over if they unfollowed me.

***Please note, none of these people currently follow me (and probably never will!)****

Chrissy Teigen

Chrissy unfollowing me would be a deep personal burn I would never heal from. I feel like we like/talk about a lot of the same things??? Don’t reject me Chrissy! We have the same face shape and I use your pics for hair inspo!!!

Luna Stephens

She doesn’t have an Instagram because she’s 3 years old but IF SHE DID (or in the future) if she ever followed and then UNFOLLOWED me, I would throw myself off a cliff. She is my favorite celebrity baby!!!!

North West

This is a personal rejection I would not be able to face.

Rihanna

People would have to hide sharp objects from me if this happened.

Martha Stewart

Honestly, I would understand if she unfollowed me. She’s such a fucking queen. But if she unfollowed me it would disappoint my mom and my grandma a lot lol.

Diane Keaton

Genuinely love her social media presence and would cry if she and her multiple layers of black and white clothing and accessories clicked “unfollow.”

Harry Styles

Let’s be real, him FOLLOWING me would send me into a tailspin.

Jimmi Simpson

Hahahaaahahahahhahah